I’ve successfully gotten rid of every picture from my “fat days.” I randomly stumble upon one every now and then and I trash it before anyone else might see it. And when anyone else takes a photo of me that looks even in the slightest like I might be carrying some extra weight, I get that picture deleted.
Workout pictures are sometimes the worst. I mean, it’s not like anyone actually looks great at the bottom of a front squat, but when you see yourself sometimes….
Ladies, you know exactly what I’m talking about.
I don’t really have many pics of me when I was at my heaviest. And I think it’s because I almost refuse to believe that “that Steph” even existed. I’m really scared of that Steph and I never want to see her again. I get really paranoid that if I let my guard down too much, she’ll surprise me out of no where. Some days I convince myself that it’s ok to take rest days from the gym…the old Steph won’t appear over night. And when the holidays come my way and I have to fight the constant “we’re having a holiday party…” invites…I get scared of that old Steph again.
- She ate fettuccine Alfredo every other day.
- She loved rice. Lots of rice. Uncle Ben’s long grain brown rice was a typical dinner.
- If she wasn’t eating half a box of Tuna Helper.
- Or Mac-N-Cheese. Sometimes the whole box.
- It wasn’t out of the ordinary for her to order pizza and breadsticks and cinnamon sticks 2-3 times per week.
- And General Tso’s Chicken with egg rolls and fried rice another 2 times per week.
- She didn’t eat vegetables for four years.
- She didn’t drink more than 16 oz of water a day.
- Sometimes she only drank juice, tea, and diet soda.
- She never exercised.
- And if she did, she ate twice as much to celebrate.
- Olive Garden was her favorite restaurant…she could dip the breadsticks in the Alfredo sauce.
- She would party a lot, drink too much beer, and binge off Sheetz foods at 3am.
- She was so, so, SO unhealthy.
- Hasn’t touched fettucine Alfredo in probably seven years.
- She also hasn’t eaten Tuna Helper in at least six.
- In seven years, she’s probably had a total amount of two mac-n-cheese helpings.
- She still eats pizza and breadsticks, but only on special occasions. Maybe 3-4 times a year? And no more cinnamon sticks, though her roommate did convince her to have a cinnamon bun about a month ago.
- New Steph loves cinnamon.
- New Steph drinks at least 64 oz of water a day. Most days at least one protein shake, and 20-32 oz of BCAAs as well.
- She exercises 5-6 days a week. And celebrates with sweet potatoes…or maybe a Paleo treat.
- Ethnic cuisine is her favorite food.
- She loves a glass of wine and has about 1-2 per week. She’s doesn’t enjoy the “nightlife” much anymore and she’s much happier in her sweats watching Netflix.
- She is really freakin’ healthy.