Busting Stereotypes: the Manly Girl
by April Harper
A 32-year-old woman who just had twins six months ago walks in to her new gym to begin her fitness journey. As she looks around the room, she sees people of all ages and shapes, but in the back of the gym she sees a girl—probably in her late 20s—much more muscular than most girls she has seen. “That girl is deadlifting 100–no wait—200–wait a minute, 300 pounds! Why is she doing that? Why would she want to? That’s what men do; she must be mean, and she will probably kick my ass if I keep looking at her. That chick is much too intimidating, and I will avoid her,” the woman thinks to herself. So after she finishes her cardio workout on the treadmill and exits the gym with haste, she calls her friend. “Oh my God, you wouldn’t believe the girl I just saw in here. She was lifting 300 pounds like it was nothing and she was so muscular and just scary! She had a nice body but she’s probably a lesbian or a fighter or something. Normal girls don’t look like that or do that kind of workout.”
But why not?
This thought process that takes place amongst a plethora of people is all too common in the world of women’s fitness. And it’s unfortunate for the girls who have become the spectacle because they are often misinterpreted in a way that stereotypes them as manly, mean, intimidating, or even gay.
A lot of these perceptions stem from typical female jealousy, but much of the influence is brought upon by the media and its influence on what a girl should look and act like in society, which is detrimental to a female’s sense of confidence. There is no right body, and for every girl to try to fit society’s perfect mold is a ridiculous concept at best and extremely dangerous—even life threatening—at most. The misconception that “women with muscle are masculine and confrontational” should be dismantled because of the historical perspective that explains the origin of the stereotype, the media’s role in spreading the stereotype, and the way the stereotype personally affects athletic women.
Social norms from the last decade have been either curvaceous or very thin-bodied women. Most women idolize a thin physique, focusing on a small waistline. They do not care about shaping their bodies with muscle, and fear appearing “bulky.”
I conducted two surveys of my own to see how people around me felt about a muscular or athletic physique on a woman. On my Facebook I posted, “When you see a muscular girl, what do you think?” and two out of seven said those women were somewhat masculine or intimidating. The two who stated this were men. I also did an in-person survey of a very diverse group at my work, showing them a picture with four athletic / muscular women. One out of seven in this group stated that the women were “too muscular and intimidating.”
What I think the problem is, is that in my experience, women typically associate muscle with being larger. They perceive it as being fat or as manly because most women don’t understand body composition. For example, two women can weigh 150 pounds at the same height yet one is very in-shape while the other is not; but most women hear 150 pounds and assume fat. While today’s society focuses on being smaller, our media is enabling eating disorders instead of educating women on how to take care of their bodies:
“Body dissatisfaction is considered to be quite common among western societies, particularly among women. Body dissatisfaction is considered one risk factor for the development of serious eating disorders.” Ferguson
Women are very aware of others’ thoughts and judgments about how they look, especially with their body. Most women try to fit the male idea of what a woman’s body should look like, which can vary between men and cultures, and can lead to obsessive dieting and cardio like suggested in a study by Nigel Barber:
“Results suggest that cultural standards of attractiveness are influenced by an evolved psychology of male selection that has implications for understanding changes in the standard of attractiveness and its relation to eating disorders.”
Women are always looking to others for input on what their body should look like–how do other women look? What do men like to look at? What do others talk negatively about? And because the norm is still “skinny is sexy,” oftentimes muscular women are the spectacle. In fact, one study shows that “Participants perceived hyper muscular women, as compared to the average woman, as having more masculine and fewer feminine interests, less likely to be good mothers and less intelligent, socially popular, and attractive” (Forbes).
I also found another study proved enough support to have the hypothesis, “Hyper muscular women, as compared to average women, will be more likely to be perceived as lesbians or as having an uncertain or male gender identity” (Forbes).
Many people I’ve encountered think women who work out a lot or eat certain amounts of macros in order to obtain a certain physique are “obsessed.” But in the fitness world, it is not obsession, but more-so dedication and will power. A lot of women have figured out that thin bodies are not always healthy–someone can be thin and yet have a higher BMI than someone weighing more,and a high BMI leads to serious health risks.
Fortunately, more and more women are beginning to focus on being healthy instead of social norms, while also finding that they like to be strong and display the curves of muscle; not fat. These same women will also be more likely to be able to protect themselves in an instance of attack from a stranger, instead of being too frail or out of shape to put up a defense. And while society should be praising these women, instead, they are judged harshly and studies are still showing that both men and women are perceiving the hyper muscular woman as violating gender norms (Forbes).
Every female I know that is involved in the fitness industry is pushing and fighting for change, trying to show women that weight training will not make them “bulky” or huge; which is a common misconception–we are all pounding the pavement trying to teach women how to be healthy, instead of helpless. We are trying to share information and teach women they can be strong and have muscle, yet still be very feminine. And eventually perceptions will change:
“As the numbers of women who are involved in weight training increases, their social impact will increase. In a sense, these women represent the next feminist challenge to rigid traditional roles and expectations of women.” Forbes
Another study shows that while most women have vast levels of insecurity, stemming from past relationships, media or society’s ideas of how they should look or act, women who are confident, strong and different from society’s ideal of perfect, are much more confident in themselves.
“…Women who were high in masculinity were also high in self esteem; body self satisfaction, and sexual satisfaction, regardless of where they stood on femininity.” Kimlicka
A great deal of women’s judgment on their bodies comes from the media; magazines, movies, music videos, commercials, talk shows, you name it. Women see magazines with movie stars on the front; one month “she’s too skinny,” and the next month “she’s too fat.” I found a post on Facebook with a video interview with a few high school girls talking about how the new thing for girls it the “thigh gap,” where their thighs don’t touch each other when their knees do. Girls are obsessing over being skinny enough for their thighs to have a gap, and it’s a popular trend picked up from runway models and Instagram pictures. Because I know a lot about body fat and composition, I know that for a girl to achieve this look she would have to be incredibly small-framed already, and because women hold most of their fat in their thighs and buttocks, girls would have to get to a very unhealthy weight to actually reach this goal of the “gapping.” But who’s to blame for wanting gapping thighs? Society….or the girls themselves?
Too many females are unhappy with their bodies and are always in search for the “perfect body” to build their own after, and often making fun of any physique that doesn’t fit that description in order to make themselves feel better. Because there are so many magazines about celebrities, the same women who want to be trendy, end up judging female celebs for any amount of weight gain or even for getting “too skinny!” This only leads to women thinking the same way of themselves, and judging their own bodies in a similar fashion.
“The increasing display of slim bodies in the mass media motivated increased interest in the possible psychological effects of such images on young women’s self and body image.” Greenwood
Negative health affects may happen when women compare themselves to the figures seen in magazines. Studies are actually showing that women who compare their own body with that of movie stars, even women who have no body image issues, could develop body image issues over time. And when desperate enough to look like the women they see, “such tendencies are linked to increased body concerns or eating disorder symptomatology” (Greenwood).
It’s easy to get sucked into this mentality if you are not a confident person, passing magazines on shelves in every store, seeing articles online every time you log into Facebook or Aol. Most of the time I see these articles I’m either shocked or appalled at what I see; sometimes the media is right and the actress is deathly thin, and sometimes the media is blowing weight gain out of proportion and the actress is still at a healthy weight. Articles such as these could affect the reader in a negative or positive way, the reader could easily say “Wow, I don’t want to be that thin, she’s unhealthy,” or the reader could see the look as appealing, maybe attention getting and exactly what she wants: attention. “Maybe if I get that thin, I’ll be noticed and maybe even be a movie star or in a magazine.” What the readers do not realize is that, these people are unhealthy, they could have a disease or disorder, they could be required to be this size for a role in a movie, maybe even a movie about someone with an eating disorder.
While visiting Shape.com I came across an article asking if pictured celebs had gotten too thin, an open ended question to an audience without the credentials to know the correct answer…ultimately leading to bias judgments. I recently picked up U.S. Weekly’s newest issue and on the front it says “MY BEST BODY EVER, Mocked as the ‘FAT’ sister for years, Khloe finally changed her diet and shape for good and gained a new confidence.” The pressure on girls like the Kardashians is tremendous, always needing to be in tip top shape and dressed to impress. “After agonizing over lifelong body issues, she yo-yoed from a size 12 to a size 0, finally settling into a size 8 several years ago, and being called, as she put it to E! last year, ‘the fat, ugliest sister’ Khloe has lost 20 pounds.” Khloe is 5’10”, and at that height, a size 0 is scary and dangerous. When someone is constantly scrutinized and compared to others around them eventually they fall into the trap of yo-yo dieting to be like everyone else, and not like the right body size for them and their height.
The misconception that muscular women are intimidating or confrontational has affected me my entire life. I’m more muscular now than I have ever been because I am a powerlifter and I train to add muscle and do very minimal cardio. When women see my style of training they tend to say things like “don’t get too big” or “isn’t that a guy’s sport?” In high school I over heard a conversation between a few female classmates about who they wouldn’t want to fight:
“I would never want to fight April, she’s a badass and would kill me,” said one girl. I weighed 120 in high school and had never been in a fight in my life. So, hearing statements like this always confused me and still does; I’ve always been friendly and sometimes shy, which may have come off as stuck up or mean. But, the stereotype of me being some sort of “badass” has followed me my entire life, even though I would NEVER fight anyone and I avoid confrontation at all costs. People look at me and see; tattoos, muscle, gym clothes, down to earth personality….Oh, she will kill me. That’s absurd, and sometimes it’s offensive; like the time I had a guy tell me I’m sort of masculine because he noticed I had muscular arms. I’m not a bodybuilder by any means, but I do have bigger arms than the average girl, which isn’t hard because the average girls’ arms are probably 10” around. Mine are 13”; yes, I’ve measured them. When you constantly have people making remarks on your physique, good or bad, you begin to wonder if you’re normal and you measure things like that. Men want bigger arms, girls want smaller ones, I just want to have arms that can help me do things I need to do or enjoy doing. I have a lot of women message me on Facebook to ask me tips on dieting and exercise because of my body, and so I have quite the following. Mostly positive, because everyone is afraid to say anything negative; but there was an instance where a friend of mine showed a recent picture of me to a girl we both worked with and the girl said to her “I don’t know why anyone would want to be that big.” This was highly offensive to me. I’m not big; sure, I’m not 120 lbs like most girls want to be but I’m not huge or manly at all. This same girl used to comment on my body every day when I worked with her saying things like “you’re so perfect, I wish I had your legs, I wish I could get my arms as sculpted as yours, you look like a fitness model…” And so based on those statements and now this new statement, I’m going to assume she said this out of jealousy, because I’m no bigger than I was when she was praising me. Could she have been lying the whole time?
Sometimes I am so aware of the things I’ve been told about myself and how I appear to others that I try to compensate by dressing more feminine; wearing more makeup, dresses, painting my nails, curling my hair, covering my tattoos, wearing heels, smiling ear to ear all the time and talking with that weird chirpy voice. But, I can only do that for so long, because it’s exhausting to try to be someone you’re not. Sure, I like to dress up from time to time, but I’m mostly at work, school, or the gym; and it’s quicker and easier for me to just be in gym clothes and tennis shoes all the time, and only dress up for my husband when we go out. Hearing people say I’m an inspiration to them and I helped them find motivation to get back in shape has kept me focused on my goals instead of any negative remarks I have heard from people who think I’m masculine or people who say things like “she’s a badass.” I just do my best to lead by example and to always express compassion and a helping hand to show people I’m not confrontational and I’m very friendly.
When people look at all the research and studies out there and they see the medias influence on people’s thought process, they can begin to see that people really put a lot of unwelcome judgement on how others look. But research only shows us “stereotypes”; it doesn’t typically show us the individuals that the research is based on. If it did, we would find that a lot of women who are muscular are like me: not lesbian, not masculine, not confrontational, and not intimidating. And these harsh judgments are leading to people wanting to change to fit what society finds acceptable, which in most cases is unhealthy.When people see a muscular woman, they should try to see her hard work, discipline and give her respect for her will power instead of breaking her down into a freak-show. No one body is perfect , everyone is different shapes, sizes, and heights and those are elements that all must be considered. People can’t keep comparing themselves to others around them because they are not the same. Looks should be based on what’s healthy and functional, not what the media perpetuates as popular or acceptable. People need to be supportive of each other and not cut each other down.
Have YOU experienced harsh judgement for being a “muscular” woman? Or maybe you’ve been too judgmental of others? Dare to share your stories below?
Check out April’s video at her latest powerlifting competition! We are so proud to call her a Strong Figure!
Works Cited
- Arnold Weber, Holly. “Teenage Girls Face Another Body Image Obsession.” 6 Apr. 2013, 8:54 p.m. Facebook. Web. 6 Apr. 2013
- Barber, Nigel. “Secular Changes in Standards of Bodily Attractiveness in American Women: Different Masculine and Feminine Ideals.” The Journal of Psychology 132 (1998): 87-94. Social Sciences Text. Web. 26 Mar. 2013.
- Ferguson, Christopher J. “In the Eye of the Beholder: Thin-Ideal Media Affects Some, but Not Most, Viewers in a Meta-Analytic Review of Body Dissatisfaction in Women and Men.” Psychology of Popular Media Culture 2.1 (2013): 20-37. Social Sciences Text. Web. 26 Mar. 2013.
- Forbes, Gordon B., Leah E. Adams-Curtis, Katie M. Holmgren, and Kay B. White. “Perceptions of the Social and Personal Characteristics of Hypermuscular Women and of the Men Who Love Them.” The Journal of Social Psychology 144.487 (2004): 487-90. Social Sciences Text. Web. 26 Mar. 2013.
- Forbes, Gordon B., Leah E. Adams-Curtis, Katie M. Holmgren, and Kay B. White. “Perceptions of the Social and Personal Characteristics of Hypermuscular Women and of the Men Who Love Them.” The Journal of Social Psychology 144.487 (2004): 487-90. Social Sciences Text. Web. 26 Mar. 2013.
- Greenwood, Dara N., and Sonya D. Cin. “Ethnicity and Body Consciousness: Black and White American Women’s Negotiation of Media Ideals and Others’ Approval.” Psychology of Popular Media Culture 1.4 (2012): 220-35. Social Sciences Text. Web. 26 Mar. 2013.
- Harper, April Stephen. “When you see a muscular girl, what do you think?” 28 Mar. 2013, 4:52 p.m. Facebook. Web. 28 Mar.2013.
- Kimlicka, Thomas, Herbert Cross, and John Tarnar. “A Comparison of Androgynous, Feminine, Masculine, and Undifferentiated Women on Self-Esteem, Body Satisfaction, and Sexual Satisfaction.” Psychology of Women Quarterly 7.3 (1983): 291-93. Social Sciences Text. Web. 26 Mar. 2013.
- Laufik, Michelle. “Celebrity Weightloss: Did these stars get too thin?” Shape.com.Shape, 2013. Web. 7 Apr 2013.
- O’Leary, Kevin. “How I Lost 20 Lbs.” U.S. Weekly 15 Apr. 2013: 54-57. Print.
- Veneracion, Janina, Kenny Mendez, Annetta Curry, Jean Colon, Eric Wright, Deanna Correa, and Alicia Carmichael. Personal Survey. 28 Mar. 2013
Photos by: Alantankenghoe; Lululemon Athletica; Robert Bejii Photography; W. Major; Jamieanne; CEBImagry.com; topgold; Candies; The Guise Archives; Sombilon Art Media
First of all great article April. I think it is interesting that the two guys from your poll thought women with muscle were intimidating. Men in our society are socialized to believe they should “dominate” women. We use terms like “whipped” to describe men that do not have the power in a relationship. And we attach value to a man if he is able to “control” his woman.
Insofar as this is true, men will find themselves attracted to submissive women that are easier to dominate. This normally would imply the woman was weak and stupid. Have you ever wondered why some girls pretend to be dumb? Well sadly this makes them more attractive to some men. I think women with muscle enter this non-submissive characteristic with these same men that are attracted to dumb women.
So women who are afraid of muscle (natural muscle) are essentially the same women who pretend to be dumb.
I think a lot of women may argue with you Erik–I’m not sure if those who don’t like muscle ALL play dumb, but I sure as heck know that I am a fan of muscle and I never intentionally act dumb!! In fact, I can’t stand those who do…it’s really annoying to see a girl act stupid just for attention. I’m really kinda curious to see if there’s any relation between that and a fear of muscle.
Let me clarify, I am not saying women who are afraid of muscle ALL play dumb. I am saying its the same driving force in society that teaches women to be submissive (and men to be dominant), which is causing women to fear muscle.