A couple days ago, one of my friends clued me into the newest “thin” trend: the bikini bridge. I had never heard of it so I started Google-imaging it. Here are some (legal) photos that I found: According to Daily Mail, the bikini bridge is when bikini bottoms are suspended between hip bones, creating a bridge between the abs and the bikini. There’s actually an entire Tumblr site dedicated to pictures of women trying to obtain this feature: Bikini Bridge.
Is this the new “thigh gap”? Writers at Daily Mail quote the trend as being “Horrific Thinspiriation.” Buzzfeed apparently published an article called the 12 Benefits of a Bikini Bridge, and the hashtag #bikinibridge is circulating on Twitter.
Is this another attempt at fat-shaming? Is it just another reason to tempt young females to push their bodies to the point of starvation? Am I making too big of a deal about something that isn’t? I mean, who in the world even sat around long enough to come up with an actual name for such a thing–that’s what I really want to know. WHO IS THAT BORED?!
Don’t get me wrong…I remember laying on the beach a couple summers ago, sucking my stomach in, looking at my bikini line and thinking to myself, “I wish my stomach was always this flat!” Stomachs always look better when you’re laying flat, right? (Hands clasped behind the head, one knee bent, and one out straight–hotness on the beach–I’ve got this down.) So it makes me actually wonder, is a bikini bridge really that hard to obtain? I’ve never been called “skinny” and I can suck in my abs enough for a selfie, so is this new buzz-phrase really all that people are cracking it up to be? Or is it truly another serious disorder sweeping our society and brainwashing our women?
Me–a female whose ultimate goal is to always look as good as I can while being as fit and healthy as can be–I am torn on this issue. So I’m handing the blogging over to the male perspective. Ladies, is a bikini bridge sexy? Is it something to strive for? Let’s listen to the guys on this one.
Steph asked me to comment on this new trend to hear a male perspective. I do think most men like girls who are thin. But bones protruding thin is not attractive. In fact it is pretty gross. I can’t imagine any guy would want to lay close to someone who was bony. Think about all the romantic songs you’ve heard, think about the thousands of poems describing a beautiful woman, do you ever remember a lyric or verse that described her as bony? Well that is what a bikini bridge is — the pelvic bones protrude.
The reason you haven’t heard song lyrics about bony women is because no one thinks this is attractive. Try something for me: close your eyes, take two fingers and massage the inside of your thigh. I want you to think of this feeling sensation from your fingers’ perspective. What you are feeling right now is what men like to feel when they touch you. Now do the same thing but instead of your thigh try massaging your knee. Do you honestly think that is what men want to feel? And I want to avoid making this sexual but we are talking about the pelvis region. I think you can get my point.
Look at this photo by Billy Cuenta courtesy of Flickr. Billy is a great photographer; the lighting is great, and at first glance you might even think the model is desirable. We have been trained by our media to believe this picture is sexy and at first glance it is aesthetically pleasing. The red, the shadows, the unblemished skin. Combine this with an erotic pose and we assume — sex. Therefore, it must be sexy. But look closer. Look at her right hip bone and follow it down towards her toes — what is that indentation? that is NOT normal! And that is NOT sexy. Is that want women really want?!?!?!?! Because men do not like strange dents in our women.
Women often care more about how they look to other women than how they look to men. Don’t ask me why.
And American society does glorify the overly thin model. The vast majority of MEN do NOT find overly thin women to be attractive. I put the emphasis on men because our society is plagued with immature douche bags who think they can date models; but in reality they have never been close to a woman or they would know the above picture is not actually sexy. And sorry, but those guys are not men.
So here we have a fast growing trend where women are STARVING themselves so much that they are turning off MEN in favor of appealing “ideal” to other women and that loser guy who wears sunglasses at night.
As idiotic as that is, it is also dangerous. Studies show that 4% of teenage girls suffer from anorexia nervosa. That may not seem like a big number but if you are a teacher in a school with only 1,000 students and 40 of them do not eat — its a big frickin number.
Stephanie asked a great question, who came up with this? and a better question is who thought this is something women should want?
Societies have always manufactured certain physical characteristics as attractive. In fact, there are very few universal norms when it comes to what is attractive. Most societies prefer facial symmetry and smooth skin. These make sense. These are signs of health and possibly good genetic stock.
Other signs of beauty might not make so much sense:
In Japan, crooked teeth or “snaggletooth” is considered attractive and women undergo expensive procedures to have their teeth made crooked.
In Mauritania, stretch marks are desired and considered beautiful.
In Uganda, they have “fattening huts” so brides can be extra fat for their husbands on their wedding day.
And in America, they have bikini bridges and thigh gaps.
You could probably make the argument that our standards are the most absurd. Many are born with crooked teeth and the American singer Jewel has even been celebrated for not “fixing” her teeth. I think Mauritania, probably makes the most sense. Why have we demonized stretch marks? Don’t most women worldwide have them? Even the “fattening huts” make sense when you consider Uganda is a country familiar with drought and famine. Having extra weight in such a place, likely means a greater chance of survival. But what exactly does a bikini bridge do? Someone needs to make sense of this for me. Preferably not someone who has paid more than $50 for a t-shirt.
Do you think the bikini bridge is attractive? Is this something women should strive for? Do you know where this new trend started?
Erik–thanks for the male perspective. I’ve read this at least 5 times and I laugh every single time at the above pic and the $50 for a t-shirt line. It’s nice to know what “men” in society want and it’s even nicer to know that they appreciate real beauty–hips, curves, strength, fit over skinny, etc. It’s also sad to know that so many women and girls are out there starving themselves in efforts to obtain something so stupid. Thanks for helping me get the message out there that being THIN is NOT true beauty!
I think that what was supposed to be mocking the ridiculousness of the “thigh gap” trend unfortunately turned into a coveted desire by many impressionable girls and women. As usual, underneath my rock that I reside in, I am safe from these silly ideals that society wants women to have. Hence why I didn’t know what a thigh gap was until I googled it.
I do not follow people on Instagram,Twitter, Facebook, or Web Sites in general that are even borderline Fitspo, I think they give the wrong impression of what fitness is all about.
ANYWAY – a bikini bridge is just another one of those things I wish I wasn’t informed of, because before hand I was living in a world of ignorant bliss. Now, I needed to know if I had one or not, so I laid down to test it out. And I do, sort of, only at the edge of my hips way, but so what? Should I feel bad about myself because it’s not a full suspension bridge but more of a plank over a small stream type of bridge? NO! A big bikini bridge to me, comes as a hindrance, cause then everyone can see DOWN your bikini, and I don’t know about you but, that’s not really my thing, SO LADIES, BURN YOUR BRIDGES, well not the actual bridge, but your want for one, YOU DON’T NEED IT TO BE BEAUTIFUL!
Just like we should do away with fat-shaming, can we please do away with skinny-shaming? Saying that “bony” women are gross and unsexy isn’t nice either. Some women are just built that way and others may be thin from chronic illness. It doesn’t help to bash their bodies either.
Erik Walker says
Hey Melissa, thanks for commenting. In defense of myself, I want to point out that I was asked to give my perspective and personally I am not attracted to “bony” women. I myself am a hard gainer so I certainly can appreciate any struggles that “skinny” women may go through to gain weight and I would never “shame” them; however, that is not what this article is about. This article is about normal women starving themselves for an ideal that shouldn’t be ideal. Perhaps you are able to avoid sites like the Chive and others that glorify things like thigh gaps and bikini bridges but I can’t seem to avoid them (have to admit the Chive is a damn funny site) and it is absurd that gorgeous women are cutting so that they can make themselves less gorgeous. Just my opinion — the male opinion I was asked to give.
I have know at least 5 men who loved my hip bones. My rib cage my thigh gap. My collar bones are always visible because they are pronounced doesn’t matter my weight. I have attained all of those while in a healthy weight bracket. I think they like it because it makes them feel masculine when with me because I look more delicate more I don’t want to say womanly but more in need for someone to take care of me. I’ve been average I’ve pushed over weight I’ve also been in recovery for anorexia. I don’t think it’s unattractive not because of my eating disorder but because I received more love attention and praise before recovery than I have since. Note that I did have all of those features even at a healthy weight according to my doctors. I also have a protruding chest bone while pregnant. My hip bones are still very pronounced now that I’m 3 months post pardom when I stand and flex my stomach. A lot of it is very natural for certain people. But some frames just can not show them like collar bones it’s all in genetics. But of course you can always achieve it if you starve which I do not recommend. And thinspo is sick! My ed isn’t for thinness it’s a result of PTSD. It’s not for the thin aspect. I apologize for the incorrect grammar.
Erik Walker says
Wow Flora thanks for such an honest reply. I totally agree that many men do want a very thin partner. Society tells men that if they do not dominate their woman they are weak. Its the reason why many men find “dumb” to be attractive — it is easier to dominate a weaker/stupider partner and some of these same social pressures would apply for overly thin too. How many girls (especially young girls) do you know that PRETEND to be dumb? I think this phenomena is why many men do not want to date a woman with muscle. They are intimidated.
I hope you find a man that loves you for who you are — a strong man. I wish you the best in your struggles.
this article is ridiculous. Anyone confident in their own body wouldn’t dedicate an entire article to marginalize others to in turn try to validate themselves. Don’t be so angry and quit worrying about what everyone else is doing. Also don’t confuse a male perspective for “the” male perspective, as stated this is just 1 guy speaking recklessly. There is no epidemic of skinny girls without boyfriends. Overall a self serving, mean, and inaccurate post.
Erik Walker says
Bikini Bridges are ridiculous. In fact the bikini bridge was actually an internet prank – http://www.nydailynews.com/life-style/health/bikini-bridge-started-internet-prank-real-damage-article-1.1569783
What this article is marginalizing is the idea that this is an ideal, something young girls should be starving themselves to obtain. Since I work with so many young athletes and young people in general I understand the real dangers of eating disorders and I understand that our photoshopped magazines and “ridiculous” media have created false ideals that women hope to obtain. The real issue here is people are NOT confident in their own body. And internet pranks are not helping.
I do agree that I don’t represent all men. Probably just the real men. There will never be an epidemic of skinny girls without boyfriends. Young boys see the same magazines that young girls do. Moreover, they also think it is ideal to be ultra skinny. Boys think their girlfriends should look just like the girl they see in the magazine. But that girl in the magazine doesn’t even look like that. A recent study done by diet.com showed that 99.9% of American magazine images of female models were photoshopped. This is a good video worth checking out that I show to my kids — https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YP31r70_QNM and the majority of my teenagers had no idea that most images they see are actually photoshopped.
So Logan if you are proud of your body that is awesome. Especially if you are healthy. The point of this article is that women shouldn’t have to feel like this is something they need to obtain in order to be attractive. And my personal perspective is its not an attractive feature (of course you can still be attractive with or without this feature).
The fact this is a website that promotes health and strength further strengthens my resolve that our readers should not be starving themselves to obtain some absurd standard of beauty that some nerds on the internet recklessly created. So yes this post is definitely self serving. We are serving the needs of our readers. People, mostly women, who want to be strong and beautiful. It might be mean — so be it. And since it is an opinion piece, I think I have pretty good insight on my own opinions and after re-examining my opinions I have found that this article is very accurate.
Thanks for the comment!
Your comment has a much different tone than the blog post, appearing now to “care” much more about the women you were identifying and publically humiliating/shaming in the post. Leads me to believe you wrote the post out of haste and were reckless, cruel, and impulsive with your words and now back pedaling to this position of “concern” you apparently have. This is shockingly coming from the same person that took the time to publically say “I can’t imagine any guy would want to lay close to someone who was bony” and also “The reason you haven’t heard song lyrics about bony women is because no one thinks this is attractive.” Goes on to define “Real men” to attempt to marginalize any other point of view that is not your own, because surely there is no other “real men” out there but you, sitting at a computer humiliating skinny girls. You probably have one of those shirts that says “real men wear pink”, because simply wearing pink wouldn’t suffice, you would have to literally tell everyone that you are a man. The inner thigh-boney knee comparison is so inadequate and ignorant that it should discount this entire article by itself. For arguments sake I wont even include the vast number of girls with conditions and diseases keeping them from what your unqualified and strictly cosmetic opinion is of a healthy weight….lets just stick with girls(just like guys) who struggle to maintain a “healthy weight.” To those girls you would look them in the face and say “I can’t imagine any guy would want to lay close to someone who was bony”??? How do you think any naturally skinny girl would feel reading this post??? Nobody wants to hold her close, and surely no one will ever write a love song including her. This is the unfortunate downside of Blogs, makes every asshole feel entitled to project their own irrelevant opinions, especially when any comments have to be “approved”, allowing plenty of room to silence any opposition. Very disappointing.
Logan, first of all, I approve all blog replies and comments to ensure that they are not spam. Once you’ve been approved, you’re always approved–unless you start spamming us. We like controversy and if we were going to “silence the opposition,” you’d have been silenced by now. Second, this is a blog that is meant to empower good health and strength among men and women. And we like to enlighten our audience with as much knowledge on the topics as such because all of our contributors are experienced in the field–Erik more so on this topic because of his degree and vast experience teaching of sociological norms–including his travels to other countries to study the same topics. He is stating not only his opinion, but what most men find to be true. “Most,” not all. And I’ve had several men come up to me and tell me that “Erik was right on” with his post. And even though it might come off as some asshole opinion to you, he’s giving the sociologic response of most men–globally. Third, Erik owns nothing in pink. He also owns nothing with the phrase “Real men.” Erik wrote this to help many women see that they don’t have to starve themselves to feel pretty. There’s too much attention being given to women who have done so and this reeks negativity to a young audience of women who skip lunch at school or go to bed hungry in pursuit of beauty. Erik is the most kind, supportive, intelligent, gentle, loving MAN I’ve ever met and he cares enough to tell women that they are already beautiful without trying to succumb to some ridiculous society norm. If he comes off as bold, rash, “rushed,” or insensitive, I’m not sorry–that’s just who he is and I’ll never apologize for it. I’m sorry you apparently have some personal issues or vendettas in your life, but maybe this blog just isn’t for you. Here’s to being happy, healthy,and STRONG.
So your move is to misdirect from the points i made and attack me personally? Nice form
It should also be noted that both of you are wearing pink in the picture under the “About Us” tab….but maybe his shirt was a rental?? Try just being nice, leave the skinny girls alone.
Haha! I forgot about that shirt! In fact I think he bought it for the barbells for boobs event. I think that’s the only time he wore it. But thanks for visiting more of our pages–you are boosting our ratings! 🙂 ps–I defended Erik, not attacking you. We never went after skinny girls–ever. We are trying to prevent girls from dieting down so hard that they lose perspective of themselves.