Why I Hate Know-It-Alls.
I’m sick. I’m sick of everyone swearing by this diet, that diet, this workout, that workout. But, more than that….I’m SICK of everyone knocking what everyone else is doing. Why? Why do you have to convince people to change what they’re doing unless they aren’t happy and aren’t seeing results and actually ASK FOR YOUR OPINION?! Why go up to someone who is training or worse yet, talk about someone else’s training (because that’s what you do ya little coward), and say they need to do “XYZ” because it’s what works and it’s the best. Unless you’re talking to the lazy guy laying on the couch watching TV, leave gym-goers alone. Because you don’t know every person’s goals.
They Tried to Make Me Go to Rehab…
I love powerlifting and I recommend heavy weights to everyone, but I don’t tell everyone to start powerlifting. Not everyone wants that, and not everyone wants to be muscular and/or cares about strength. (Either I’m crazy or everyone else is crazy, but that’s beside the point.) But, don’t force-feed your idea of the perfect training or perfect diet to someone who doesn’t want it or ask for it. You can’t force a child to eat vegetables; DFACS gets involved in that shit. I don’t want to be ripped as all hell, so guess what? I still eat McDonalds…and pretty damn frequently (OMG I’m gonna die). Yeah, I’m in school to become a Registered Dietitian and I work Dietary in a Rehab facility (no, not drugs rehab, ya psycho), but the old saying “anything in moderation” is how I live my life.
And I’m Lovin’ It.
I don’t care if I eat McDonalds whenever I please because I’m not hopping on a competitor’s stage, I have no plans of it either, and I think it’s cool that people have the control and the discipline to eat and weigh and plan and organize and good GOD….you guys are a different breed. Kudos. But, I refuse to organize my food intake becuase I would be bat-shit crazy (ER). That said, if you must lose weight, you’ve got to compromise. You may have to give up your Micky-Ds. (And for the record, when I say lose weight, I mean body fat–not just by whatever weight you can get off–if that’s what you want, lose a leg, you’ll hit 120 easy.) But, if you want to lose actual body fat, you can change your body with a lifestyle that is not extreme and is easy to maintain. Powerlifting and McDonalds is pretty easy for me. It’s not extreme and I’m still pretty damn happy. On the other hand, I have had people say “Well, I don’t like meat, I don’t like vegetables, I hate lifting weights, I want soda with every meal…” and if that’s the case, you probably won’t hit your fat-loss goals. You MUST compromise.
So Get Off My Back!
I still drink soda, not every damn day, and you don’t have to feel like you must feel guilty for that shit either. Unless, you are supposed to be making changes and you are not sticking to them…feel a little guilty but chill out, there’s always the next time to get it right . I don’t have a crazy lean physique, but I eat what I want. Is everything I eat textbook healthy? HELL NO. Am I happy with my belly pudge? Let’s say it’s an even trade. I’ll take those McDonalds cookies over abs any day. BUT!!! That’s me. And there are plenty like me who don’t want to look like the cover of Muscle and Fitness…they just want to look BETTER. So, stop with the “You’ll never get anywhere with that diet or that workout” criticism because, yes, yes you will. And if you plateau? If you’re not 100% happy? Then yeah, you WILL have to step it up a notch and get a little stricter and work a little harder. And guess what else????? Unfortunately, you will be different from Jane who gets to have 3000 calories a day and is still crazy lean. (Or maybe you’re not, GO YOU!!) But you have GOT to remember, EVERY PERSON is different. Every routine can be different, and every diet works differently for each person. STOP judging everyone else.
Can You Eat Your Cake and Get Leaner Too?
Just like you can’t compare your calorie intake to Jane’s, and your workout routine to Sally’s, you can’t compare your body to Helen’s either. You gotta be careful with that comparison because you’re different–deal with it. Be the best YOU can be. Do what makes YOU happy. Don’t fall into a way of life that is a chore because you don’t enjoy it and you’re only doing it because it’s the new craze. Don’t powerlift because April says so, and don’t bodybuild because Steph likes it. Do it becuase you enjoy it and you’re seeing the results you want. If you wanna get fit and you like recreation sports, join a soccer team. You wanna get lean or build muscle, shed fat, etc., you’ve got to move. Now, if you hate working out….it’s gonna suck for you. So, you gotta decide what’s more important. Just like my damn chocolately, gooey, warm, melt in your mouth, delicious, heaven sent, angel cookies are WAAAAAY better than those bottom abs I like to look at. I made that choice…every day.(And I stare at pictures of other hot girls abs while I eat them). It’s my choice and I’ll probably make it again tomorrow. But, I choose to be somewhat hot, sexy and healthy by lifting heavy, drinking plenty of water, eating enough protein, and not overeating everything else. (Sometimes.)
Don’t Ask Opinions if You Can’t Handle the Truth
I know someone who never drinks water and chooses to suffer with weight issues plus swollen legs (God knows what else she suffers from because of that), and that’s her own choice. And every day when she comes to me asking what to do to fix her problems, I tell her to drink more water, move, etc , (you know what to do), but she says “No.” You know what I tell her ? Stop asking. Because, guess what? You can ask people all day long what to do, where to start, how to eat, and on and on. You can interview Jillian Michaels, read every book, study every athlete, but that will NOT make you wake up having reached your goals. Dedication is required, and you have to WANT what you’re complaining about. Stop talking and JUST DO IT…you know, like NIKE. If you want to lift, get off your ass and go do it. Even if you’re lifting random stuff around your house because you can’t go to the gym, JUST LIFT IT. There is always a way. Tell me there’s not, I WILL show you. I DARE you to tell me you don’t have time. Bring it. You’re not going to like me when I tell you about all the people who overcome debilitating obstacles just to make time to train for a 5k. Anyone who is dedicated to improving his or her health WILL find a way.
Why Can’t We Just Get Along?
It’s possible that you don’t like my blunt honesty (aww, why can’t we be friends?), ask me if I care. But my points here, and there are several, are these:
- Don’t knock other people’s workout/food/life goals
- Don’t criticize others’ decisions
- Don’t hesitate to go after your own goals
- Moderation in life is key
- Every person/physique/mentality is different
- Do what makes you happy!
- And if you want it, go get it!!!!!
Feature Images by loop_oh and Laurent Jean Philippe
Other images identified by title of picture
Great article….I loved the part about ” Don’t Ask Opinions if You Can’t Handle the Truth”….because it is to the point where I don’t even want to give my help or opinions anymore because it falls on deaf ears….ie….A woman asked me about losing 5 pounds or so before they went to the beach in about 2 weeks…..after going over some diet info and then showing them how to do intervals on the treadmill…..I find out that later that evening after the gym….they went out to eat and had Wings and a Beer….WTF! I am sure I didn’t mention anything about Hot Wings prior to her beach week. You can talk to people until you are blue in the face…and until they are ready to do it themselves……it totally drains me of my own energy. People just need to figure it out for themselves.
Ditto, ditto, and ditto, Randy!!! The one thing that I find so upsetting is when someone asks for help and then turn a deaf ear. It’s frustrating, hurtful, and time/energy wasted. I couldn’t agree more with you!
Strongfigure and Randy…those folks are called “ASK HOLES” they will badger you and keep on asking what to do, what are you doing and how in the heck can I do this…then do non of it….ask holes….they are EVERYWHERE!
hahahahaha….”Ask Holes”…I love it!
I wanted to speak up. I have been reading your guys site for sometime now, enough that I want a shirt… haha. I LOVED this article. I battle this everyday! My boyfriend and I work in this biz (fitness industry) and he is up my ass like a hemorrhoid daily about my diet. I love working out BUT I refuse to really change my diet. I have added more veggies and water and cut out SOME processed foods. I won’t give up beer and once a week I get a McDs breakfast or worse a Panera cinnamon roll but I hit the weights hard and I hit cardio even harder on Panera mornings. I get it done without killing myself in a diet. I have a friend who only eats Chicken, Veggies and Peanut butter and thats GREAT for her but I don’t want that life. This article made me feel so better and not so alone in my anti diet ways!
ok A) We will get you a shirt! lol…just send me a message from the “Contact Us” tab. and B) I totally sympathize…with your friend who eats chicken and veggies!! I am the person who swears by the clean eating but then splurges after a reeeeallllly hard workout (Obstacle Course Race, Go Ruck event, etc.). I really wish I were more like April and I really REALLY wish that I could speak my mind like April does!
As long as you’re happy, that’s all that matters. That cinnamon bun sounds heavenly and you’re not depriving yourself while working so hard…I totally think you are doing what’s best for you. GOOD JOB!
I’m glad that I gave you peace of mind!!! I see a lot of people who try to get healthy and think the only way is by being super strict and then they mess up and feel so guilty they quit. And they fail. And they GAIN because of what it does to their mind. And I tried to do the whole clean eating strict blah blah….nope! But I didn’t feel guilty when I ate what I wanted. I felt happy. Because I was still healthy, I was still a healthy weight and still hitting PR’s. 🙂 so yeah, I’m not hard on myself because I do what makes me happy. If I decide to be leaner, ill have to adjust , but I’m happy with myself and you should be too! I’m glad I could help you see that your normal and completely acceptable. :)))
April it is truly amazing you have reached the “happy with myself” status because I have to be honest — I am no where near reaching that elusive goal. I have always battled genetics and this frustration has fueled me to work harder and harder. But the frustration is still there. I know there will always be fitter looking people and stronger people but these same people help me to formulate my own goals. Perhaps they make my personal goals unrealistic but they are what they are. Like you, I still splurge and make those conscious decisions that I would rather eat this and pay for it later ( I am in awe of Steph’s will power and I could never ever be as committed as her). And I guess lacking this will power, I beat myself up for not achieving my goals. Anyway, great article and thanks for helping me justify the saltwater taffy that I am going to eat tonight — it helps me to feel like I am at the beach.
Awww…Erik, I wish I could just take you to the beach!!!
I’m in such awe of April’s contentment as well…there are days I feel like this at random…usually it’s when I’m doing a wine tasting or hanging out with friends. I think to myself, “I’m having so much fun right now on this date or with these people, who cares if I have a six pack?! I’m strong and I’m healthy, and I can kick serious ass. Who needs ‘ultra lean’?!?!”
But then I wake up the next day feeling bloated or puffy and go back to hard-core will-power mode. I’m honestly my happiest eating clean. I feel gross after I eat sweets…no matter how AMAZING it feels going in. My problem is that I just really really REALLY wish I could stick to my goals full time, instead of flip-flopping….one month of whole foods, one month random splurges, one month paleo, one month wine every night, one month no alcohol at all…etc. etc. Erik–you are sweet saying that I have crazy will power–but I wish it was even better!!!!!!!!!!!!! NEW GOAL: All paleo/whole foods. Intermittant fasting between 12pm and 10pm. Wine splurge once/wk. Can I stick to it?
April–I am that girl you hate. LOL.
And by Intermittent Fasting between 12-10, I meant, I would eat my daily calories between 12-10.
No way! I don’t hate the people who are strict. I applaud them. But I think that beginners think they HAVE to be the sane way to see results. They do to see ‘the same’ results as those people. But I don’t care what kind of ‘diet’ or nutrition lifestyle anyone leads, I just want people to realize they don’t have to obsess or be that strict unless they have that super lean goal. And I want people who are strict to not beat themselves up 😉