A Workout for You, a Holiday Rant from Me.

Tomorrow’s workout:

For time: 

• 50 burpees
• 100 KB Swings
• 50 burpees

If you don’t have a kettlebell, sub 100 lunges!

Warning: this is a blog post that has NOTHING to do with fitness and everything to do with the upcoming holidays!

There are two kinds of people in the world: those who can’t wait to start playing Christmas music as soon as they can (sometimes even before November 1st), and those who refuse the sounds, sights, and smells of the holiday until AFTER Thanksgiving.

I am the first, while Erik is the latter.

Erik got into my car yesterday to go to the gym and I had my radio set on the local station that’s already playing holiday tunes. I knew what was coming and I giggled until he said it,

“Is this the radio? They’re playing Christmas songs already?!” 

“Hahaha–yes! Isn’t it wonderful?!”

And I continued to sing the song well past Erik turning the radio off. For me, hearing holiday music just makes me happy. Erik feels stressed and rushed.

“It makes me think of how I haven’t bought any presents yet, and we haven’t even celebrated Thanksgiving!”

Thanksgiving is Erik’s favorite holiday. 

So I get it–100%. But for me, it’s different. When I hear Christmas music, I think of the entire holiday season–Thanksgiving included. I think of cookies and hot cocoa, shopping, wrapping presents, lots and lots of lights, and tons of holiday food! I think of sweet potatoes and stuffing, gingerbread, pumpkin pie, turkey, ham, gravy, and did I already say cookies? 😉 I think about baking, making peanut butter balls, and creating homemade presents that I found off of Pinterest. I think of seeing as many people as I can see over two-month span, and I get excited about taking time off from work, traveling with Erik, and days of feeling stuffed and watching football and hanging out with our puppies. And don’t laugh, but I also think of church+Chinese food+board games+wine. (Erik’s favorite holiday tradition is Christmas Eve Mass followed by ordering an INSANE amount of Chinese food to eat with the whole family while playing board games and drinking wine.) It’s always a fantastic time.

There is, unfortunately, a flip side to my holiday feelings and love of Christmas music; and that’s the sad part of me that does a pretty good job of staying hidden. But as much as I ADORE the holiday season, it makes me incredibly sad that my dad isn’t here to spend it with him.

Thanksgiving used to be about dad and me sneaking pieces of turkey from the platter when no one was looking and trying one of every dessert with a full compare/contrast discussion of them all. Christmas used to be about dad hanging lights outside, driving us around to see neighborhoods full of music and decor, and then waking up well before the sun to sit around the tree and exchange gifts.

One Christmas, I took dad to see my favorite band–the Tran-Siberian Orchestra. He said it was the best concert he had ever been to. And now, when I hear them, sometimes I smile, sometimes I sing, sometimes I direct an imaginary orchestra in my car, and other times I just try not to think about how sad I am.

And last week, I was driving down the interstate while listening to the song “I’ll be home for Christmas.” I’ve actually never liked this song–who needs a sad song at Christmas?! But when I heard it this time, I “got  it.”

I don’t go “home” much anymore–not to where I grew up. It’s too sad and I have a lot of guilt I feel because of that. I don’t see the rest of my family as much as I should, and I know I should……but you know that other song, “There’s no place like home for the holidays”? It’s true. There’s no place like home. But what happens when “home” just doesn’t feel like “home” anymore? I suppose that’s where the line, “if only in my dreams,” comes from. Because sometimes, that’s the only time I get to go back there…in my dreams.

Thank God for the family that I do have left and for Erik’s family too! Spending the holidays at Erik’s home where he grew up reminds me of exactly how things used to be when I was a kid. And I love seeing Erik relaxed and happy. It’s really comforting and I am so grateful for his entire family. They help cure my sadness and I’m pretty sure they don’t even realize it!

I’m sorry for the sad Christmas rant you guys! I’m really a happy, happy person. But when I heard those songs the other night on the radio, I just couldn’t stop thinking about this love-and-sadness emotional holiday head tour, and I just had to get it out.

And I am REALLY looking forward to both Thanksgiving and Christmas! This year, Erik’s birthday is on Thanksgiving so that will make it extra special! And his brother’s fiance is having a bridal luncheon the following Saturday–also super exciting. And this year, there’s even more to be thankful for! Erik’s  brother is getting married on the 26th! I think this whole entire holiday season is going to be a blast and I cannot wait for it–the good, the sad, the exciting, and the new!

I want to know, which person are you? Are you listening to Christmas music yet or must you wait?!! Let me know in the comments!